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Here you will find helpful suggestions and ideas on how I have helped couples display a memory table on their wedding day. How to honor those who have passed with dignity and respect on a day you wish they were physically there to celebrate with you.
A memory table at a wedding is simple to set up but meaningful to include. This is a sacred representation for those no longer with you. Follow these easy steps to pay respect to the ones who have passed but will forever be in your heart, especially on days you celebrate.
If you have been conflicted about how to memorialize a loved one at your wedding, this article is for you. Find unique tips on how to showcase a significant person in your life that has passed.
Where to Place a Memory Table?
If the venue your wedding is at will be the ceremony and reception location, place the memory table in a neutral spot. Then the table won’t need to be moved after the ceremony and can be viewed during the entire event.
If your ceremony and reception are at two different locations, place the memory table at the reception location. The table should be displayed in an area that is easy to view by guests and convenient to get to. Don’t have the table placed where there is a lot of traffic, but not too hidden, so it’s forgotten.
Some couples have told me that they knew instantly where the memory table should be placed the first time they set foot on their wedding venue. A moment of remembrance table at a wedding celebration can stir up many emotions. Allowing guests the opportunity to pay their respects with a bit of privacy is a lovely gesture. Keep this in mind when deciding where to place the memory table.
How to Decorate a Memory table?
Place items such as candles, lanterns, photos, and memorabilia like a baseball cap, plaque, special tokens, and mementos. Include anything that represents who the deceased was and how they lived their life. If multiple people (parent, grandparent, sibling, aunt, uncle, etc. ) are being honored on the memory table, combine a photo of each and a small item that represents who they were.
A four or six-foot table works well with a white linen, or a rustic farmhouse table if that goes with the theme of your wedding. Adding flowers that were a favorite of the loved one is also a nice touch. One of my former couples had a Foosball table in lieu of a memory table. This added an extra element of fun and entertainment during cocktail hour. The bride’s grandfather was a Foosball lover and used to play with the grandchildren.
If the memory table is near the ceremony location, I have seen couples walk over to the memory table during the ceremony and light the candle(s) together and have a moment of silence. This is also beautiful while playing a favorite song the deceased loved.
Another option is a collage of photos and signage on an easel with a floor lantern beside the easel. This can be placed near the guest sign-in table as guests arrive for the ceremony. Making it an easy setup to then relocate to a secondary location during the reception.
Have seed packets of Forget-Me-Nots for guests to take with them. These beautiful tiny “blue” flowers symbolize love and respect for the dearly departed. Forget-Me-Nots grow between April-June. As they grow and bloom, they are a wonderful reminder of the love that will always remain in the hearts and souls of family and friends.
Signage Ideas for the Memory Table:
- Wish you were here
- In memory of those gone before us
- Forever in our hearts
- This light burns in honor of those we love and are watching today from heaven
Story Time:
I have seen many ways a loved one has been honored in all the past weddings I have coordinated. One I will never forget was when a mother of the bride had the urn of the bride’s grandmother resting on a chair in the front row of the ceremony. The bride had no idea her mother was doing this (nor did I or anyone else). Complete chaos erupted 45 minutes before the ceremony (tears, shouting & profanity). A coordinator’s worst nightmare was unfolding less than an hour before launch time.
Outcome: The bride knocked back a shot of tequila, and it numbed the drama (the coordinator may or may not have done the same). The urn remained in the first row for the ceremony. May Grandma “Bessie” rest in peace.
Other Ways to Honor a Loved One on Wedding Day
- Reserve a seat at the ceremony in their honor with a photo and a flower.
- Add a favorite dessert to the dessert bar or a favorite family recipe if the venue will allow it. Or include a family favorite sweet treat as a departing guest favor.
- Mention the loved one(s) during a toast and have a moment of silence. I have seen this done during a blessing before dinner.
- Play a song of remembrance during the ceremony.
- Incorporate a remembrance charm or an image of the loved one in the bridal bouquet, or weave favorite flowers in the bouquet.
- A locket with an image of the loved one can be placed inside the groom’s suit.
- If the mortuary that served your family took a digital fingerprint of your loved one, you could wear a piece of this jewelry. Click here to view sample fingerprint jewelry.
Conclusion:
There are many ways to honor loved ones who helped make you who you are today. Discuss openly and honestly with your partner on different options that will be best.
Whether a loved one passed many years ago or recently, the journey of grief can be a long road, but each day gets a little bit easier. It is so important to mourn well so you can continue to live well for the rest of your life. Grief is when “love” has nowhere to go.
The honor of setting up and displaying a beautiful memory table at a wedding celebration can be a very healing and powerful moment as you move forward in the next steps of your life.
~ Happy planning and enjoy your wedding day steps ~